Unbalanced
Okay, I don’t think I’ve ever screamed so loud. And I don’t think I’ve ever gone into hysterics quite like that. Maybe Sierra’s right. Something might be wrong. I just got off the phone with her. And I screamed. And threw things. And cried. And I hate being mentally unstable.
I’ve just about decided that I don’t want friends anymore. I just want to be alone the rest of my life. It might be easier that way. But the friend I thought that could carry me through anything just caused me to go into a blind rage. I mean, it’s not my fault that I don’t know what causes me to be this way. And it doesn’t mean that it’s anything SHE did. So getting mad at me isn’t going to help anything. And she may say she wasn’t mad, but I know her. And I didn’t ask for her to call me and jump on me about “moping around” all day. If she can’t handle it, she’s free to leave. I’ve told her that before.
My mom is convinced nothing is wrong with me, but she doesn’t know the half of it. I really feel like I’m going insane. Except that crazy people don’t know they’re crazy. And if I was really trully insane, I wouldn’t know it. And it’s probably my hormones. And EFT will help. And BLAH BLAH BLAH! She thinks she’s a psychologist but she’s NOT! I’m not even anywhere near my period! It can’t be that! But something’s wrong, and it’s hampering my ability to function in life. But even if we DID go to a doctor, which we’re not, then they wouldn’t be able to tell me anything… They never can. So I guess I’m just going to have to handle it myself. Like always.
